| DC: The
first question I wanted to ask you, and all of these questions have to do
with kindness because I see that as being a central tenet to your book
and, of course the title, Above All, Be Kind, which is wonderful.
I wanted to ask you what makes kindness one of the best or one of
the most important qualities of a human being? ZW: It's funny, I got a
question similar to this a couple of days ago.
Kindness is a word that tends to sound soft, maybe even a little
bit weak compared to other virtues. And to me, kindness is such a deep
concept because it is so simple. We
all understand what it means and yet it has such depth and capacity if it
is used expansively-having such far reaching effects.
To me, if we can be kind, meaning think of others, think of their
suffering, consider the effects of our choices, if we can do that at a
very deep level, not a superficial level of just being nice to people who
we meet or nice to our family but deeply kind, that is thinking of others
and thinking of their well being, if we can do that we can transform our
world. The Dalai Lama has
been quoted as saying "kindness is my religion." And for me it is as
well. I think that when we perceive kindness in that depth, that
comprehensively, it has so much power.
DC: Yes, that makes sense.
My second question, and you may have already answered it; you are
suggesting that we continually ask ourselves the question "Are we being
kind?" Should this apply to
every action and for every person?
ZW: Well I'd like it to
but, of course, that is such a tall order.
For something that initially sounds so simple, kindness, it is so
complicated and requires an incredible amount of consciousness and
awareness on our part to actually put into effect the value of kindness.
So without being too hard-hitting on this and suggesting that
everybody at every moment to be conscious of all the ways in which their
choices affect others, it's still a path that we can strive to walk on.
It's still something that we can hold as an ideal and strive
towards. And I know that as
much as I may want to be kind, it is a very difficult thing to be kind in
all of our choices because we make choices that affect countless other
people, that affect the environment, affect other species. My choice about
what I eat might be affecting somebody halfway around the world who is
involved in the production and distribution of whatever it is ...it's a
fruit or something that comes from South America or Indonesia.
It's a huge journey that any product that we buy and anything
that we use go on and it's hard to be conscious.
But, if we are even aware at all that's the first step because
the first step is our awareness. And
then, once we have that we can then make new choices.
Without awareness, without the consciousness, we are incapable of
making different choices. We
just don't know what they are.
DC: That also makes sense.
And my last question related to this, Zoe, is how do we make
kindness a discipline for others and ourselves?
ZW: I think everybody has
to find that in themselves and find that out on their own.
I think that people may find support and nurturing and
determination and motivation that can come from maybe a religious
institution or a meditative practice, time in nature, when they reconnect
with themselves-turning off the TV, reading inspirational words.
I think that people find it in different ways and this is an even
deeper question, I think; which is how do we actually change ourselves?
How do we change because as anybody knows who tries to break out of habit
it can be extraordinarily difficult to try and change some aspect of
ourselves? What we are
talking about is changing our awareness, becoming more conscious.
I think that people need to find first the motivation to want to do
that and then the practice and the discipline will continually help them
along the way. And for
motivation, at least in my book, Above All, Be Kind, people can
find the motivation in the love for their children.
For those who don't have children, we can find the motivation in
our love for the earth, in our love for our families, for other species.
But whether or not we have love for another species, or for the
earth or for somebody who is making our clothes five thousand miles away,
and still bring awareness of what our true choices can be in relationship
to kindness; that they can be the ones that do the least amount of harm
and the most amount of good. I
consider it a spiritual practice and a discipline to do that.
Everybody has to find it themselves.
DC: Yes.
It sounds like from what you are saying is that regardless of who
you are or what your life circumstances are that you'll find that
discipline somewhere in love.
ZW:
Yes, I think you are right. And
if you don't find it in love, in other words, there are some people who
find it in love in one area but maybe not in another.
So that they might love their own child but not care about some
other child who is working in some sweatshop twelve to fourteen hours a
day to make their child's clothes.
How can we help somebody expand their love for that other child?
And I think that is where a discipline of coming from love but also
committing to do the least harm, regardless of whether or not you are
coming from love, is critical.
|
